Tribute to a Life Well Lived

 

They say everybody has a story and some stories simply beg to be told.  This is one of those stories. 

Pam’s story began on December 9, 1957.  Pamela Annette McGill, born the 4^th child to a couple who were told they could have no children but would eventually have 6.  I always thought it was cool that Pam’s initials spelled out her name……..P-A-M.  As a young girl, I also thought it was very cool that Pam was born on the same day as one of our teen heartthrobs, Donny Osmond.  The only person I knew that was born on my birthday was Minnie Pearl.  Life just didn’t seem fair. 

Growing up, Pam was always a Daddy’s girl.  It could be due to the fact that she favored his side of the family more, or maybe it was because she had that incredible and sometimes quirky sense of humor, a silliness and zest for life like our dad possessed.   Whatever it was, Pam was destined to become a pivotal part of the McGill family composition. 

Since our family had lost our brother Roy Allen from spinal meningitis at a year old, Pam was born as the middle child in our family of five kids.

  As some of you may understand, being a middle child can be a challenge.  But being a middle child AND a preacher’s kid is something only other preacher’s kids who are middle children can relate to.  Early life with five kids in the McGill household was sometimes chaotic and at times, Pam seemed to be stuck in the middle, torn between being one of the big kids or hanging out with us “babies”. 

Our maternal Grandmother (who we affectionally named “Granny”) lived with us at times and helped Mom and Dad with the daily tasks of raising five rambunctious children in a minister’s home.  We all knew that Granny loved us but her love for Pam translated into a unique bond that only those two would share.  Granny was a storyteller.  She would create the most vivid bedtime stories straight out of her imagination that would enthrall us kids and keep us in suspense until the next storytime rolled around.  We even got to where we actually looked forward to bedtime just so we could hear the adventures she would create from her very vivid imagination.  Granny created a love for language and literature in us that we all adopted, but especially our two sisters, Janie, and Pam. 

Granny Pearl holding baby Pam

Pam held onto that love of reading throughout her life.  She could pick up a 500-page novel in the morning and have it read cover to cover by the next afternoon.  I tribute the best characteristics of my sweet sister to the nurture, teaching, and compassionate care she received early in life from our beloved Granny.  When Granny passed away in 1972, a big piece of Pam’s heart went with her.  She would never recover that missing piece but somehow as she grew older, Pam’s personality took on the traits we all loved most about our dear Granny Pearl. 

Pam with Grandmother McGill 

And what was it that endeared the older generation to Pam?  I’m not sure I know exactly, but our other Grandmother, Grandmother McGill, who had something like 28 grandchildren in total once told Pam, “Now, don’t tell the other kids, but you have always been my favorite grandchild.”  She didn’t have to tell us - we already knew.  There was just something about Pam that naturally drew people to her. As her story is told, maybe you will understand why.

The late ’60s were some of the happiest times for our family.  This is a picture of the Ooltewah Church of God where our Dad preached for 5 years. 

My sisters and I talked often about those years and how special they were to our family.  The connections made in those simple times have lasted through the decades for our family. 

McGill Family circa 1967

Janie would meet her husband Mickey during that time and they have now been married for 51 years.  Pam was Janie's maid of honor and Rodney and I were flower girl and ring bearer in the wedding. Our handsome Daddy performed the ceremony.  

In the early seventies, our family fell on some hard times.  Our Dad was a welder by trade and had left the ministry temporarily to go back into the labor force.  Our Mom, who had been a housewife their entire marriage, had to find a job outside the home to make ends meet.  Our country was involved in the Vietnam War, Inflation was high, wages were low and a lot of families were struggling, ours was no exception.  Janie and Mickey had married and moved to West Tennessee and after high school, Terry moved out on his own.  With Mom and Dad both working outside the home, more responsibility fell on Pam as the middle child.  She became not only a teenager trying to survive growing up in the ’70s, but she was now the family cook, housekeeper, and a most reluctant caregiver to her two younger siblings.  (Who were, by the way, perfect angels...most of the time.)  Pam was a cool babysitter, pretty much letting us do as we pleased, and looking back, we could have made things a lot easier on her, but we were, after all, Preacher's Kids and we did have a PK reputation to uphold. 

Pam serving up some Christmas punch

In the summertime, we spent our time doing what most kids of the ’70s did – we watched game shows on TV.  While Mom and Dad were at work we would watch The Newlywed Game, Family Feud, Let’s Make a Deal, Match Game, and our all-time favorite – The Price is Right.  For a while, we even got hooked on soap operas like General Hospital and All My Children.  

We played with the neighborhood kids, rode our bikes, went swimming at the Church of God campground (Girls pool on the left, boys on the right), and even did a few chores when we absolutely had to.  

For lunch, Pam would fix us potted meat sandwiches mixed with mayo and dill pickles and we drank many cans of Shasta sodas because Mama got ‘em on sale 12/$1.00 at the M&J. 

Mama shopped at M&J because they gave away S&H Green Stamps. For those of you too young to remember S&H Green Stamps, just google it. 

Most days, around 4:00 in the afternoon, Pam would turn off the TV at which point we would do a cleaning blitz through the house because mama expected it to be clean and supper made when they got home.  I can still see the three of us running through the house picking up, cleaning up messes we had made, and making sure all our chores were done, hoping Mama would think we had cleaned all day.

Like most siblings do, there were times we fought.  At other times, we fought even harder.  One time I remember, Mama cut Pam’s beautiful nails back so she would stop scratching us in our squabbles.  Not long ago Pam told me she hasn’t had pretty nails ever since.  Although we fought, most of the time, we didn’t.  We stuck together and although it was fine for us to pick on each other, we never allowed an outsider to do it.  Pam took up for us with the neighborhood bullies and always had our back. Most of them were afraid of her because she was always quick to put them in their place.

Pam watched out for us as best as a teenager could and for me, she became like my second Mom, teaching me about life - what to do, what not to do, and basically, just how to survive.  Pam was never good at sneaking or lying, she would always get caught whenever she tried.  With Pam, what you saw was what you got – she was the "real McCoy".  In recent years, I was reminded that if you don’t want to know the truth about a subject, don’t talk to Pam about it because she would give you her fact-based opinion on the matter, delivered with love of course – and she was usually right. She told me a few weeks ago that she didn't think she would be going home.  How I wish she had not been right this time.  

Pam became a great cook at an early age.  She introduced us to many new exotic foods!  Foods like Chef Boyardee Pizza in a box (a Friday night favorite), Tacos with home fried shells (which my sister Janie taught her how to make), and best of all and still our favorite, Kraft “box Spaghetti”.  Through the years, Pam and I have shared many a box of this savory cuisine.  I opened up her pantry just the other day and there sat a box of this delectable dish.  If you haven’t tried it, Food City still sells it and you can thank me later.

Pam was gifted with a baby boy in the late summer of 1976.  I always remembered Jeremy’s birth year because our country celebrated its bicentennial that year.  It was hard being an unwed mother in the ’70s but Pam was determined to give Jeremy the best life she possibly could.  She got a job working the evening shift at Olan Mills downtown Chattanooga on Carter Street.  Mama had retired from there on disability and kept Jeremy when she was able while Pam worked.  Those years were hard on Pam with Mom’s health declining, Dad working out of town a lot and Rodney and I being teenagers absorbed in our own little worlds. 

Pam didn’t realize it, but her life was about to change in a big way when she met her knight in shining armor, Shannon. Well, he wasn’t exactly a Knight riding in on a white steed, but rather a Prince who drove up in a sporty white Mercury Capri with two little Princesses in tow.  

Pam & Shannon the early years

Tammy and Renee

Pam met Shannon, at my brother Rodney’s wedding. You see, Rodney’s wife Kim and Shannon are cousins and as fate would have it, Pam was serving cake at the reception alongside Kim’s two sisters when she leaned in a little too close to one of the candles on the table catching the lace collar of her pink dress on fire.  Luckily, as any prince would do when a damsel was in distress, he helped her to put out the flame, at the same time, sparking a new flame that has burned for over 41 years.  

Pam Christopher, Pam McGill and Debbie Christopher. 
This is the famous pink dress and these are the candles that started the flame.

Here is where I say, “And they lived happily ever after”, right?  Well, the story continues.

Not long after Rodney’s wedding, Pam was scheduled to report for duty in the Air Force but as her departure date approached, she knew she couldn’t leave her new love behind, so she changed her mind about her call to service and answered another call – the call to matrimony.  In November of 1980 these two love birds tied the knot. 

Their family was made up of his, hers, and eventually theirs when their daughter Beth came along in 1984.  

Times weren’t always easy for this newly blended family but these two were determined to make it work.  Juggling kids, jobs and at times utter chaos, both of them pursued their education – Shannon in electronics and Pam going back to school after many years to become an RN.  Pam always had a knack for taking care of others whether it be pets, siblings, or the runt of the litter from Daddy’s brief stint as a pig farmer (that’s a story for another day).  In 1981, when Mom’s health declined Pam stepped in to make sure she was taken care of.  Some people are just born to be caregivers it seems, and that was our Pam.  Nurse Pammy, as I liked to call her.  

When Mama died, I was nineteen and had just graduated from high school.  Daddy was still working outages with TVA and traveling, so Pam and Shannon let me stay at their house a lot and when I say a lot, I mean I moved in.  We had some good times staying up late watching movies after the kids went to bed, talking, singing with Shannon on guitar, and just being silly.  I’ve always been grateful for Shannon allowing his new wife’s kid sister to crash on their couch during that time.  Life rolled on through the eighties and nineties.  Working, raising kids, moving from their little house in Piney to their bigger spread on Creek Road.  Together, Pam and Shannon built a wonderful life for their kids and grandkids that were to come.  Jeremy had found a perfect life mate in Stephanie and Pam loved her and was so happy when they welcomed their little son Joseph into the world and into their family.

But as with all life stories, sometimes you get thrown an unexpected curveball.  Tragedy struck in the Fall of 2000 and we watched Pam’s heartbreak into a million pieces upon hearing the news that her son Jeremy had died unexpectedly.  She always said the loss of a child was the worst thing a human could endure and having children of my own, I’m pretty sure she was right.  

The last picture of Jeremy with little sister Beth

As tragic as this loss was for her, Pam was a survivor and managed to forge on through the grief, living her life, taking care of her family, her patients, and continuing to be a blessing to everyone around her. During those years, I was able to stay home with my kids.  Pam was such a lifesaver for me when we were raising the girls – coaching me how to take care of a sick baby over the phone, giving me advice and guidance like a Mother usually does for her daughter. She was always careful when giving out medical advice and would sometimes add, “but I’m not a doctor”.  I knew that, but I am pretty certain she was as smart as many of the doctors I knew so I took her advice to heart.  

During those years on her days off from work we would get together at least every couple of weeks and go shopping, do some crafting or just spend time together cleaning her big house. She would pay me for helping her because she said I needed some “play money”. For lunch on those days, we would eat our favorite – boxed spaghetti.  Sometimes we could get Janie to take a day off from teaching so we could have a sister day.  We had our last sister day in early June of this year when we drove to Pikeville to see Janie after her knee surgery.

Sister Days were always lots of fun!

I went to work at Memorial in 2003 and fortunately for me, my office was just down the hall from the Critical Care Unit where Pam worked.  Many days Pam would walk by my office door and stick her head in to say hi.  When she was in a big hurry she would just make goofy faces at me as she passed by.

Pam was excited to get to meet
Dr. Travis Stork from The Doctors
TV Show

I will forever treasure these memories of her at work.  We tried to have lunch every now and then, but I quickly learned that if you are a critical care nurse, you don’t get to take many lunch breaks, usually just eating on the run, a bite at a time.  Sometimes she would say, “Moe, I haven’t even had time to pee – I sure don’t have time to stop and eat lunch.”  The life of a nurse is hard ya’ll.    

One day I badged myself into CCU to see if she had a minute to chat.  That particular day when I turned the corner, I walked in on my sister and about 6 other nurses lifting and turning a critically ill patient who weighed in excess of 500 pounds.  At that very moment, it hit me what a hero my sister really was.  This was just another day in the unit for Pam and her co-workers but to me, it was an image I’ll never forget, and it made an impact on how I viewed my sister from that moment on. 

Pam with some of her work family, the awesome nurses in CCU

Pam and Nurse Issac

I had a better understanding of the lifesaving, life-changing work she and the others did and I knew, as did everyone else in the unit, she was good at it.  As her baby sister, I could not have been prouder.  I am 100% sure that our world is a better place because Nurse Pammy was in it. 

Pam retired from nursing in May of 2018 due to some health complications that made it hard to continue the 12-hour shifts her career required.  We had hoped for a nice long retirement and for Shannon to get to retire with her soon so they could enjoy their hard-earned golden years.  But again, as all life stories do, there are twists, turns, and unexpected chapters that take us to places we don’t always want to go.  But Pam’s story?  It isn’t over.  How do I know? 

First of all, Pam’s story continues on in her precious family and a host of friends who will cherish her memory, continue her legacy of caring for others, and follow her shining example of a life well-lived.  The next time we see her, she won’t be short of breath or aching in her joints, having issues with digestion, or feeling tired.  I like to think that she will be running to us with open arms and that sweet, trademark smile that we all loved. 

Secondly, the Bible tells us in II Timothy 4:8 that “Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge shall give me at that day; and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing.”  Family and friends, we can rest in that hope knowing that one day, we will see Pam again.  God looks upon the heart and I am sure when he looked at Pam’s heart he saw what we all did.  A heart full of love, of service and a deeply held faith.  So many prayers were lifted on Pam's behalf as she laid up in that hospital bed that I can't help but wonder if one of the angels approached the throne and said, "Lord, this one sure is loved by so many people on earth. Anybody loved that much must be something special. Can we go get her now?" So they did.

Pam playing on her phone in route to the
beach in early June of this year before
her hospitalization.

Rest easy sis, until we meet again.  

CHILI WILLIE

Who doesn't love CHILI?  Who doesn't love Willie?  Put them together and what do you get?  Chili-Willie!

I know, it's corny, but look - It's May, 2020 and the hubs and I, along with the rest of the known world have been quarantined in our homes since mid March due to a Pandemic known as the Novel (new) Corona Virus.  This will be one for the history book's ya'll!  So forgive me if I get a little corny - I'm hurtin' for material!  

Not that everyone doesn't know it, but just to document for history's sake - EVERYTHING is closed down to try to keep everyone as safe as possible.  The White House CoronaVirus Task Force comes on television every day and updates us on how many people have been infected, how many have died and on positive days, they update us with the number of people who've actually recovered.  We've got so many new catch words and phrases now like "flatten the curve", "shelter in place", "social distancing", "working from home" and the word "unprecedented" is being thrown around like southerners toss out the word "Ya'll".  It's crazy, but even amidst the crazy, we southerners are doing what we do best - cookin' and eatin'.  Our first three weeks of quarantine I gained a whopping 8 pounds!  Yep, you read that right.  I was cooking like Paula Deen's baby sister she didn't know she had! It was as if I was a contestant on one of those cooking competition shows and honey, I was in it to win it!  



Fried chicken, biscuits and gravy, roast and taters, you name it, I was cooking it.  We were living it up.  Then one day I had to go into the office for work and much to my horror - I couldn't zip my pants!  Those three weeks of little exercise and hearty southern eating, really took it's toll.  It was fun while it lasted but Tink and I knew we had to get back on our clean eating plan that we try to stick to during normal times. We did and for the last 3 weeks or so, we've been eating salads, broccoli, grilled chicken or shrimp, lean beef and trying to watch our diet.  But today, we just craved something spicy so I created a new "healthier version" of Chili which I have affectionately named "Chili Willie" in honor of one of my country music faves, Mr. Willie Nelson.  

Like Willie, this recipe is rugged, spicy and when you eat it you feel like you could be a Cowboy working a cattle drive on a dusty Texas roundup.  (Okay, I may be going too far, but you get my drift.  It's good....It's Texas good.)  Ya'll, I'm not lying - I can picture Barbarosa eating this Chili.  Wait, what's that?  Who's Barbarosa, you ask?  Three words - Just watch it!




Now, back to the recipe.  

Melissa’s Chili Willie

Ingredients:  

1 Lb. Lean Ground Turkey (or 93% lean ground beef)

½ Onion (Small to Medium size)

1 Tbsp. Garlic (I use the Spice World squeeze garlic)

2 cans Chili Beans (any brand you prefer)

1 can Hunts Petite Diced Tomatoes

1 can Original Rotel Tomatoes & Peppers

2 8oz. cans Tomato Sauce

3 Tbsp. McCormick’s Chili Powder (add more if you’d like it spicer)

1 Tbsp. Apple Cider Vinegar

2 Tbsp. Sugar

Water as desired

Optional:  5 Wieners (Oscar Mayer or any brand you prefer)

Salt & Pepper to taste

Brown turkey or ground beef large pot.  (My Daddy wouldn't eat poultry, so I always like to add a beef option in my recipes, keeping in mind that there are some folks who don't eat birds. Still can't understand that, but I digress.)  Now, add onion and garlic and cook with the meat until it's browned.  (If using ground beef, drain on paper towels if needed and put back in pot.  Turkey should not need to be drained.)

Open all canned ingredients and add one by one, stirring as you go.  Add Chili Powder, Vinegar and Sugar and mix well.  Bring all this to a low boil, then decrease temp to a low medium setting on your stove top.  If you like your chili with more juice, at this point go ahead and add some water, about a half cup at a time, trying not to make it too watery.  Note:  If you’ve never tried adding hot dog wieners to your homemade chili, you should try it!  Slice up the wieners and add them to the chili at this point.  Note:  This will add calories and fat to your chili, so be aware of that.  You could always add turkey wieners. Now, taste and add salt and pepper until it tastes how you like it.  Turn on low and simmer for at least 25-30 minutes, stirring occasionally.

This Chili tastes good on day one, but even better as a leftover dish.  (You can’t say that about many foods, now can ya?)

I think Willie would be proud.  Maybe I'll just send him a bowl.  Stay well ya'll!

Distracted

“Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village.  A woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house.  And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching.  But Martha was “distracted” with much serving.  And she went up to Him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?  Tell her to help me.”  But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary.  Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”  Luke 10: 38-42

All my life, as long as I can remember, I have identified with the distracted sister,  Martha.  

In school, I struggled to keep a B or C average even though I knew I was just as smart as anyone else.  My main problem had nothing to do with learning disabilities.  It was distractions.  If the classroom door was open, I was watching the janitor sweep the hallway or counting how many people walked by wearing a blue shirt.  If a pencil and paper were within reach, I was doodling all over the page, lost in my own world of doodle art and daydreams, complete with its own soundtrack from the music that constantly plays over and over in my happy-go-lucky little head.  

When High School rolled around, I became even more distracted given the smorgasbord of extracurricular activities offered to happy, fun seeking and outgoing girls like me.  My high school days were filled with fun, cheerleading, friends, sports and of course, boys.  (Yes, the opposite sex was always a pretty big distraction.)  I wanted to make good grades and I knew I was capable, but again, I was distracted. 

After graduation, I attended a faith based college to study Secretarial Science.  (Yes, that was actually a major field of study back in my collegiate days.)  After all, I figured I needed something to fall back on just in case my first career choice of becoming a singer or famous movie star didn’t work out.  

College was such fun!  So many new freedoms away from the parents for the first time.  Parties, friends, social activities, but as you may have guessed, once again I got distracted and it didn’t take me long.  By Spring semester it was apparent to everyone, including myself, that I needed to pack up, head home and get a regular job.  Mama’s health had rapidly declined while I was away, and I’ve never regretted going home being close to Mama during her last few months with us.  Besides, I could always go back to school later and finish my degree, but then…again, distraction reared its ugly, little head.

A full time job, a husband, two children and a busy schedule over the past 30 years or so have at times been a real challenge for someone who is easily distracted like me.  Like Martha, I stay busy all the time. Today I look back over my life and am able to clearly see a number of missed opportunities, unmet goals and unrealized dreams all because I have allowed myself to become distracted.  Yes, I’m a Martha.  Also like Martha, I seem to pour my energy into the temporary things that seem to matter and be important at the time, but don’t hold much importance to the big picture that is my life. 

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about distractions and how they affect not only my own life, but the lives of people around me.  Now, more than ever, we have so many things that pull us away from the important things that truly matter.  Listen, I love technology and being ‘connected’, but at the same time, I’m so thankful smart phones, social media and 24/7 connectivity was not a ‘thing’ when my husband and I were raising our girls.  Why?  Because I KNOW ME!  I would be that Mom sitting in the stands at the gym or ball field missing her child’s big moment because I was focused on this little rectangular “window to the world” that would, in essence, remove me from my own.  That’s right, I would miss the important things, those little moments in time that you can never get back.

I want to take this opportunity to talk to all parents of young children, both Moms and Dads.   Listen, I see you and I want you to know that I get it, I totally do!  Please know that I’m not judging you.  I can’t really judge you because, well....I am one of you!  I see you when your children are calling for you, four, five and six times but you don’t hear them because you’re on your phone.  Then maybe you snap at them as if they have interrupted something serious or something really important.  This happens numerous times throughout the day, every day, every week.  I see it all around me and it makes me sad.  It also makes me just a little bit thankful.  I'm thankful that I didn’t have the extra distraction of smart phones and social media to deal with while we were raising our kids.

Going back (waaaaaay back) to when I was a very young girl, back when telephones hung on the kitchen wall, most Moms stayed home with their kids.  Then, gradually, Moms started going to work.  Finally, our Mom did.  I can't tell you how our lives changed after that and unfortunately, it wasn't for the good.  The presence and security of having a parent that was accessible 24-7 is a valuable asset for any child.  A common phrase coined during those years was, “It’s about quality time, not quantity of time.”  Somehow, I guess, that made parents feel better about leaving their children in the care of someone else.  Society also came up with a new descriptive for children caring for themselves after school - “Latch-Key kids”.  There was a time when my siblings and I were those kids.  We got off the school bus in the afternoon and came home to an empty house.  Although it was necessary at the time, I didn't like being a latch key kid, and many times resented it, but I digress.  I’m waiting for someone to name kids of today’s generation.  Maybe they could call them “Twitter Tots” or “Cyber Kids”, often being raised on a steady diet of technology driven media and outside influences.

 The sad thing is that now, not only is the amount of time we spend with our kids short, but that “quality time” has all but disappeared in many cases.  Today, children have to share the two to three hours they get to spend with their parents with the social media world.  After a while, the children learn that it’s just not worth competing with that world and sadly, they are getting lost in a cyber world of their own.  Tablets, video games, and many times, children as young as seven or eight years old are being handed a smart phone of their own.  Really Mom and Dad?  This really does scare me.  I can tell you honestly that we never had a minute of trouble from our daughters until we handed the oldest a cell phone at the age of 15.  When you give them a phone of their own, you’re in essence inviting the outside world to come into your home and be a part of your circle of influence on your children in ways you can’t even imagine.  My advice is to try hard to resist getting them a phone too early and when you do, you may want to think twice about making it a smart phone. Talk about distractions!  After all, do we realize how little time we actually have to raise these little ones?  Did I realize it?  No.  It seems like raising youngin's will last forever, then one day you blink and they’re grown, gone, and that precious time we've been given to impact them is over.

So, to all you Moms, Dads, and even Grandparents (I’m talking to myself right here), let’s put our phones and computers away when our little ones are around.  They can feel our distractions and it translates to them something totally different than what we intend to convey. I imagine that to them, you don’t care enough to watch them, don’t care enough to hear them, don’t care enough to answer them and in their opinion, you don’t care about them.  “Ouch!”  I know, that hurts to hear, doesn’t it?  It hurts me to think I have been guilty of these things with not only my grandchild, but my grown children and spouse.  Why?  Because I'm distracted.  There's that word again!

I felt led to write this because I’m tired of distractions keeping me from what’s important in my own life.  I’m bad enough about it myself, but I see people all around me who are even more distracted and I’m worried about the effect it is having and going to have later on our entire world.  I can't help but feel this is a trap of the old devil himself to keep us away from the things we should be doing.  

Personally, I resolve today to be more intentional about where my focus lies.  I want to live in the real world, my world, the here and the now.  I want to give my sweet Granddaughter the attention she needs while she is still young enough to actually want it.  I want to engage in better conversation in the evenings with my husband after we both have had a long day at the office and truly be there for him to listen when he needs me to hear. I want to spend more time listening to God through his word and less time listening to what the world wants me to hear through tainted media.

Will you join me today in turning off some of the distractions in our life and becoming more intentional and focused?  I know our world and our families will be much better off if we do. I believe our very future depends on it.  - Hugs!  Moe

“I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you.  I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible.  1 Corinithians 7:35

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Born to Give Part 2 "The Yard Sale"

In the book of Deuteronomy, it says to “Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the Lord your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to do.” Deuteronomy 15:10.  

Well, folks, it happened again, proving that no matter how hard you try, you just can’t out-give God.  Some of you may remember my blog post from a few years back titled “Born to Give.” (Actually, I’m sure you don’t remember it, who am I kidding?  However, you can read it here before you go any further.  It’s a little long, so you may want to sit down, grab a hot OR cold drink, and put your feet up.  That’s fine, I’ll wait……comfy?  Cozy?  Now, click here:)    http://wewereborntobe.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2013-07-10T19:02:00-07:00&max-results=7

Amazing God we serve, huh?  But wait - the story only continues from here. Warning:  This blog post is even longer than the last one because, obviously, I have much to say about this subject.  If you take time to read this, you may want to refresh your drink and just keep your seat…….

Disclaimer:  I am sharing this so that you will see how God keeps his promises and not to glorify anything that we may or may not have done that is considered “good.” Trust me, I struggle to be that person that gives unconditionally.  My family and I strive every day to do what is right and sometimes fail miserably at it, but God deserves every bit of the praise if any is due.  When I see things happen like this, I just HAVE to share! So here goes!
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My girls (Briana and Lindsey) and I just love a good yard sale.  Not shopping them particularly – we’re not really into that.  No, we like to have yard sales.  Some people call them garage sales, but we have them out in front of our house on the driveway, so I guess technically, they are “Driveway Sales.” (SIDE NOTE:  When I was a little girl, I saw a sign at a department store at Grant City shopping center in Rossville, Georgia that read “Sidewalk Sale” and I asked my mother if we could buy one.  “One what? she asked.  “A sidewalk!  I’ve always wanted one.”  Yep, I was obviously a little dingbat.)  

But I’m sure the girls and I are in the minority of folks who actually get a thrill out of having yard sales.  Let's face it, yard sales are a lot of hard work for very little money, usually.  But you know, it’s not just about making money, it's much more than that.  To us, there’s nothing like storing up our treasures (not hoarding, mind you, just storing up), then working for days dragging them out of the basement, hanging, labeling, and organizing all our stuff by category, size or price.  Then, on the morning of the sale, we wake up early (because you have to beat the early bird shoppers) to drag it all out onto the driveway for friends, neighbors, and anyone who passes by to peruse our ‘gently used’ treasures.  All of this and I didn’t even mention all the new people you get to know by having a yard sale.  But enough of all that, on to the matter at hand!

I don’t know why, but all of a sudden, I’m just over the things that I’ve been hanging onto my entire married life.  You know, what things I'm talking about the “I’m sure I’ll need that again one day.” items or (here's my favorite) “I’ll get back into that size 10 again by next summer, I just know it!”  Yeah, right, my “one day” never comes and even more evasive, my “next summer” never seems to arrive.  This past Saturday, we had the biggest yard sale we’ve ever had.  My oldest daughter Briana who is between jobs right now, worked diligently for almost a week sorting, organizing, pricing, and labeling a mish-mosh of clothing, housewares, baby items, you name it – we had held onto it!  Bri even developed a unique system of keeping up with which one of us sold what to make it easy and accurate to tally up the funds at the end of the day.  That girl amazes me!  Oh, and NEVER MIND that it was 90+ degrees in the middle of the day, and NEVER MIND that we only had one 5-minute ‘lull’ in traffic around lunchtime (just long enough to woof down some “gut-bombers” – for those of you not from the Southeast, that’s little Krystal hamburgers akin to the White Castle’s up north) and NEVER MIND we all three got a little sunburned from not having remembered our sunscreen (okay, okay, not a little sunburned…..does the phrase “red as a lobster” give you a clue?)  NEVER MIND all those things – because, at the end of the day, we made over (are you ready for this?) $1,150 off our gently used, once loved and never-to-be-missed treasures!  Amazing, right?  But do you want to know the MOST amazing part of all?  Here it comes.  (Are you still with me?  Need a potty break?  I’ll wait…..)  

You see, Briana and her husband Anthony, along with my only grandchild, Tatum, are about to make a move to Virginia for Anthony to start a new job on an army base.  (Mi-Moe and Papa aren’t the least bit thrilled with the 8-hour distance between our sweet toddler and us, but that discussion is for another day.)  I just had to tell you all that because you needed to understand our reasoning behind having a yard sale the sale in the middle of the hot, Georgia summer.  We're not crazy, I promise - Bri just needed to come up with some money quickly to help them get settled into an apartment in Virginia.  Besides, she didn’t really want to have to move all the extra boxes that weren’t absolutely necessary.  

Well, I had been telling the girls all morning that whatever we didn’t sell we were going to load up in my van and take it to the benevolent room at church, or to the Salvation Army, Goodwill or Timbuck Two, - didn’t matter, but under NO circumstances was it finding its way back into my house! So after repeating that for probably the third time, a little gray-haired, jean-clad lady overheard me and approached me with a question.  “Mam, I heard you say you were going to take what was left off somewhere.”  She continued, “I wouldn’t mind at all coming back when you’re done selling and taking off what you don’t need.  You see, I like to keep things in my home to help people when they need it.  If somebody’s home burns or they get a divorce, just get out of jail, or are in need in any way, I try to help them.  Why I’ve got several rooms in my house just full that I pull from when the need arises.”   “Really, I asked?  Because that would be wonderful to put this stuff to good use for people who need it.”  This little lady (we’ll call her Miss B) lived way out on Sand Mountain in an area called “The Big Woods.”  Let me just say, it’s not called the big woods for nothing!  They have lots and lots of trees, some farms, houses, trailers and from my experience having lived there a while growing up, lots of snakes.  Ewww!  But I digress.  (I hate snakes!)  Figuring there were a lot of people needing help in so many ways in her community, we got her name and number and promised to call her at the end of the day.  

When the heat got to us (around 4:00 p.m.), and we simply couldn’t stand any more ‘fun,’ I gave Miss B a call.  There were still a lot of really nice things left, and the girls and I jointly decided that we were going to give her pretty much all of it.  After all, we assumed, she could probably use some of the things herself, and what she couldn’t use we felt sure she would pass along to others in need.  There were household items, a couple of nice queen size comforter sets, lots and lots of nice clothes in all sizes, some toys and baby items – Easily a short bed truck full. When Miss B returned with her truck (which turned out to be an older model large SUV), I put my arm around her and said, “Now, if you want to take this and have you a big ‘ole yard sale to see if you can make some money for yourself out of it, you just feel free to do that.  If we can help someone else make a little money off our old stuff, we would be happy.”  I added, “If there is anything you want to keep for yourself like those nice comforters, you feel free to do so.”  Miss B was so appreciative and said that she had eyed that comforter earlier but didn’t have the money to buy it.  She didn’t have a comforter for her bed because they are just "too expensive." So the girls and I loaded up her truck and off she went.  High fives all around!  The best way to have a yard sale, y’all!  It’s all about “purging” what you don’t need, and if you can help someone else out, that’s a win-win.  Now, as Paul Harvey used to say, “Here’s the “rest of the story”….  

Yesterday while I was at work, I got a call from Briana (the one moving to Virginia and also the one who found the golden egg.)  What Golden Egg, you ask?  NOW HEAR THIS:  If you didn’t follow my instructions at the top of this novel to go back and read my blog from 2013, then you don’t know what I’m referring to.  You can go read it now, right here (I’ll wait.): HTTP://wewereborntobe.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2013-07-10T19:02:00-07:00&max-results=7…Anyhow, it seems Briana had been running some errands and went by the post office box to get the mail.  She said, “Good news!  I got an envelope from my school today (she’s getting her degree online), and it seems I overpaid last semester.  They sent me a refund check for $262!”  We both agreed – that was a gift from heaven, and God had opened up his celestial window and tossed out that blessing in the form of a check addressed to Briana.

SEE?  It never ever fails my friends!  Like I said, you just can’t out-give God!  It is a natural law that the creator put in place from the beginning of time.  “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together and running over, shall men give into your bosom.  For with the same measure that ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.”  Luke 6:38

 You may be thinking, “But that lady did you guys a favor by hauling all that junk off.”  But you have to understand.  Normally, we would have culled through what was left, pulled out what we could sell next time, or put the nicer items on a Facebook Buy/Sell/Trade page and made a little more off of it.  If my calculations are correct, we probably could have made another, oh, I don't know, maybe $262! But this time, something just told us to give it to Miss B.  I, for one, am glad this little lady dropped by our sale.  Not only because she was nice and we made a new friend, but because she helped reinforce a life lesson that my husband and I have always tried to impress upon our children – No matter what - you just can’t out-give God and doing the right thing always brings the best rewards and usually just when you need them the most.  

Thank you, God, for all your blessings, both great and small, and thank you, Miss B, for sharing with others up in the woods that truly are very, very BIG.  (Oh yeah, and watch out for those sneaky snakes!)  

Melissa